"Acceptance Self Love" - Osho on idea of worthlessness in Human Beings – Everyone is utterly Essential

Osho – Anand means bliss, mahbuba means beloved. God creates the world out of his love. The world flows out of his love – it is an expression of his love, an explosion of his love. He loves every creature… from stones to stars. We are all protected by his love, we are all continuously showered on by his love. Everyone has to consciously become a beloved of god. Once this recognition penetrates the heart, it transforms your whole being. It is as if suddenly a light comes into darkness and darkness is gone.

Just the idea ’God loves me’, just the feel of it – ’He surrounds me like a caress, his lips are on my lips, his heart is in my heart. I am not abandoned by existence; I am loved, cherished by existence. I am not worthless, I am not unworthy…’ and the dignity and the splendour starts growing in one.

And remember a great paradox: the real dignity has no ego in it; the real splendour has no idea of any superiority. In fact, the ego is just a cover-up for our worthlessness. Because we think ourselves worthless, we try to prove in every way that we are not worthless. That effort is our ego trip – ’I am a president of a country, I am not worthless. I have so much education; I am not worthless.’ ’Look, I have got so many lovers; I am not worthless.’ But deep down we are constantly nagged by our worthlessness. Deep down we know we are worthless, dust unto dust.

That has been taught to us down the centuries. Our souls have been corrupted and poisoned. The priests and the politicians have conspired against the whole of humanity. This is their whole conspiracy: to create the feeling of worthlessness in human beings. If they feel worthless they can be dominated by the politician, they can be dominated by the priest. If they feel worthless they will seek some authority figures to depend on. If they feel worthless they cannot not be independent. That is the secret trick in it. If they feel worth, if they feel loved by god, if they are nourished and cherished by existence, they will not look up to any father-figure, to any authority – political, religious, or any other.

So the basic conspiracy has been created in every child – the idea that you are absolutely worthless, that you are not up to the standard, that you are not as intelligent as you should be, that you are not as beautiful as you are supposed to be, that your behaviour is ugly, to improve yourself, to prove yourself. That’s what improvement is: an effort to prove ’I am somebody.’ The ego is nothing but an effort to cover this inner worthlessness that has been created by the society. My effort here is to give back the dignity that really belongs to you.

Everyone is utterly essential. This existence needs you – without you it would not be the same existence. And not only does it need you: it needs everybody in the same way, so there is no question of superiority. It needs even a small blade of grass as much as it needs the sun and the moon. As far as the whole is concerned, everything is absolutely essential – the great oceans and the small dewdrops. It will miss the small dewdrop if it is not there; it will not be so beautiful. There will remain a hole in it which cannot be filled by the great oceans; they can only be filled by small dewdrops.

As far as the whole is concerned, there is absolute equality. In asserting one’s own dignity, one asserts the dignity of the whole of existence of animals, of trees, of people, of mountains, of rivers, of all. So it does not create any superiority complex, because a superiority complex is nothing but an inferiority complex standing on its head, doing sirshasan, a headstand; that’s all it is. And it has nothing to do with ego. Ego simply shows a poor person who has not yet become aware of his inner splendour and the gifts that god has given to him.

Source – Osho Book “Don’t Look Before You Leap”

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Osho Teachings (Osho answers questions of his disciples)

"Acceptance Self Love" Osho – Nobody is here to fulfill somebody else’s expectations

[Osho gives a sannyasin a come close energy darshan]

Osho – The energy is perfectly good. Just one problem is there, that you don’t listen to your own voice; and that has to be done. Don’t be distracted by anything else – follow your own feeling. If you are feeling happy, be happy; don’t think of anything else. If you are feeling sad, be sad; don’t consider others, their expectations. Your energy is flowing perfectly well, but you consider others too much, so sometimes you repress, sometimes you become pseudo, inauthentic. You look into others’ eyes and then you try to fulfill their idea of you. Now this is the problem.

Nobody is here to fulfill somebody else’s expectations. And the person who tries to fulfill somebody else’s expectations will always be in misery because he will not be true to his own self. He will not be respectful to his own self, and to show disrespect to one’s self is to show disrespect to god. And the punishment is misery. Respect yourself! That does not mean that you become hard on others – that simply means that you become soft on yourself. Be tender towards yourself.

You immensely need to grow a kind of tenderness towards yourself. You are very tender towards others but very hard towards yourself. That’s what has been taught to everybody, to be hard on yourself and be soft to others; that is utter nonsense. If you are not soft to yourself your softness towards others is just a show, a pretension, hypocrisy. And it is not going to make the other happy either, because he will see through the game; and particularly those who are close to you, who are in love with you, will always be able to see through the game. So you become false and they are not satisfied with your falsity, because falsity can never satisfy anybody. To be really tender and caring towards others, one needs first to be basically tender and caring towards oneself That’s where you are a little hard. Relax!

And your energy is going so well that now I can speak through your energy to you, so whenever you hear something from the inside, remember: I am telling it to you! And that is your commitment. Be polite to others if sometimes you have to go against their expectations; apologise, but don’t pretend. This is one of the problems that always comes in relationship: you have to consider the other, continuously, and he has to consider you, and both become false, inauthentic. How can love grow when both are inauthentic, insincere? Love grows in authenticity – it is a fragrance of authenticity. One needs to be absolutely genuine, only then does love grow. So in the world there are so many lovers and no love at all, because the basic requirement is never fulfilled.

So from this moment, this is your work on yourself: be utterly genuine. And even… it may create a few troubles in the beginning, but only in the beginning. Soon people start understanding – they can see your truth…. And if you respect yourself, others start respecting you and start respecting the space in which you are. But if even you are not respectful to it, who is going to. be respectful to it?

The old saying in the Talmud is: ’If I am not for me then who is going to be for me?’ Then nobody is for you and you are left in a kind of limbo. Be for yourself and only out of that can you be for others too, because then you will have something to share, to give. The energy is perfectly good – there is nothing wrong in the energy; just your mind goes on interfering with it. Stop interfering!

Source – Osho Book “Don’t Look Before You Leap”

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Osho Teachings (Osho answers questions of his disciples)

"Acceptance Self Love" Osho – When a person cannot love himself and hates himself, he hates everybody else

Osho – Remember life can be really lived only if you live it naturally. If you impose artificial commandments over it, you will destroy it. For example, I told you: unless you love yourself you cannot love anybody else. Hence I say to you, be selfish, because only out of selfishness is altruism born. But you have been told again and again that you are worthless. You have been told that you have no value — that as you are, you are only worth condemnation; that as you are, you are bound to hell.

You have to be worthy, you have to change, you have to become a saint, this and that. One thing is certain: that as you are, you are not of any worth. How can you love yourself? And when a person cannot love himself and hates himself, he hates everybody else, he hates the whole world. By hating himself he becomes life-negative, and the person who is life-negative is life-destructive.

Your monks and nuns have all been life-negative; they have not affirmed life, they have not nourished life, they have not beautified life, they have not been a blessing to the world. They have been a curse! Your monasteries should disappear; we don’t need monasteries. We certainly need sannyasins, but they should live in the world, part of the world, transforming the world. But the basic transformation that has to happen is that they should be lovers of themselves.

The person who does not love himself becomes a masochist, he starts torturing himself. And these masochists have been worshipped as saints down the ages. And a person who is a masochist cannot be anything else than a sadist too, because he who tortures himself would like everybody to be tortured. Torturing becomes his sacrifice to God.

So there have been masochists, there have been sadists. And because in life you cannot find any quality purely, so you will not find masochists and sadists separate. It is almost always the case that the same person is both: masosadist — everybody is like that. You have been conditioned by your religions in such a way that you are against yourself and against others. On the one hand you torture yourself with beautiful rationalizations, and on the other hand you torture others, again with beautiful rationalizations.

Life has become a torture chamber, a concentration camp; it is no more a celebration. It should be a celebration. If nature is allowed to take its own course, it is bound to be a celebration.

Source – Osho Book “The Book of Wisdom”

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Osho Teachings (Osho answers questions of his disciples)

"Acceptance Self Love" Osho – How can i distinguish between Enlightened Self-Love and Egomania?

Question – How can i distinguish between Enlightened Self-Love and Egomania?

Osho – The distinction is subtle but very clear, not difficult; subtle, but not difficult. If you have egomania, it will create more and more misery for you. Misery will indicate that you are ill. Egomania is a disease, a cancer of the soul. Egomania will make you more and more tense, will make you more and more up-tight, will not allow you to relax at all. It will drive you towards insanity.

Self-love is just the opposite of egomania. In self-love there is no self, only love. In egomania there is no love, only self. In self-love you will start becoming more and more relaxed. A person who loves himself is totally relaxed.

To love somebody else may create a little tension, because the other need not be always in tune with you. The other may have his or her own ideas. The other is a different world; there is every possibility of collision, clash. There is every possibility of storm and thunder because the other is a different world. There is always a subtle struggle going on. But when you love yourself, there is nobody else. There is no conflict — it is pure silence, it is tremendous delight. You are alone; nobody disturbs you. The other is not needed at all. And to me, a person who has become capable of such deep love towards himself becomes capable of loving others. If you cannot love yourself, how can you love others? It must first happen at close quarters, it must first happen within you, to spread towards others.

People try to love others, not being at all aware that they have not even loved themselves. How can you love others? That which you don’t have you cannot share. You can give to others only that which you have already with you. So the first and the most basic step towards love is love of oneself; but it has no self in it.

Let me explain it to you. The ‘I’ arises only as a contrast to the ‘thou’. ‘I’ and ‘thou’ exist together. The ‘I’ can exist in two dimensions. One dimension is ‘I-it’: you — your house, you — your car, you — your money; ‘I-it’. When there is this ‘I’, this ‘I’ of ‘I-it’, your ‘I’ is almost like a thing. It is not consciousness; it is fast asleep, snoring. Your consciousness is not there. You are just like things, a thing amidst things: part of your house, part of your furniture, part of your money.

Have you watched it? A man who is too greedy about money, by and by starts having the qualities of money. He becomes just money. He loses spirituality, he is no more a spirit. He is reduced to a thing. If you love money, you will become like money. If you love your house, by and by you will become material. Whatsoever you love, you become. Love is alchemical. Never love the wrong thing, because it will transform you. Nothing is so transforming as love. Love something which can raise you higher, to higher altitudes. Love something beyond you.

That is the whole effect of religion: to give you a love-object like God so that there is no way to fall down. One has to rise. One sort of ‘I’ exists as ‘I-it’; another sort of ‘I’ exists as ‘I-thou’. When you love a person, another type of ‘I’ arises in you: ‘I thou’. You love a person, you become a person.

But what about self-love?. — there is no ‘it’ and there is no ‘thou’. ‘I’ disappears because ‘I’ can exist only in two contexts: ‘it’ and ‘thou’. ‘I’ is the figure, ‘it’ and ‘thou’ function as the field. When the field disappears the ‘I’ disappears. When you are left alone, you are, but you don’t have an ‘I’, you don’t feel any ‘I’. You are simply a deep AMNESS. Ordinarily we say ‘I am’. In that state, when you are deep in love with yourself, ‘I’ disappears. Only amness, pure existence, pure being remains. It will fill you with tremendous bliss. It will make you a celebration, a rejoicing. There will be no problem in distinguishing between them.

If you are getting more and more miserable, then you are on the trip of being an egomaniac. If you are becoming more and more tranquil, silent, happy, together, then you are on another trip — the trip of self-love. If you are on the trip of ego you will become destructive to others — because the ego tries to destroy the ‘thou’. If you are moving towards self-love, the ego will disappear. And when the ego disappears, you allow the other to be himself or herself; you give total freedom. If you don’t have any ego you cannot create an imprisonment for the other you love; you cannot create a cage. You allow the other to be an eagle in the high heavens. You allow the other to be himself or herself; you give total freedom. Love gives total freedom. Love IS freedom — freedom for you and freedom for the object of your love. Ego is bondage — bondage for you and bondage for your victim. But ego can play very deep tricks with you. It is very cunning, and subtle are its ways: it can pretend to be self-love.

Let me tell you one anecdote. Mulla Nasrudin’s face lit up as he recognized the man who was walking ahead of him down the subway stairs. He slapped the man so heartily on the back that the man nearly collapsed, and cried, “Goldberg, I hardly recognized you! Why, you have gained thirty pounds since I saw you last. And you have had your nose fixed, and I swear you are about two feet taller.”

The man looked at him angrily. “I beg your pardon,” he said in icy tones, “but I do not happen to be Goldberg.”

“Aha!” said Mulla Nasrudin, “so you have even changed your name?”

The ego is very cunning and very self-justifying, very self-rationalizing. If you are not very alert it can start hiding itself behind self-love. The very word ‘self’ will become a protection for it. It can say, “I am your self.” It can change its weight, it can change its height, it can change its name. And because it is just an idea, there is no problem about it: it can become small, it can become big. It is just your fantasy. Be very careful. If you really want to grow in love, much carefulness will be needed. Each step has to be taken in deep alertness so ego cannot find any loophole to hide behind.

Your real self is neither I nor thou; it is neither you nor the other. Your real self is altogether transcendental. What you call ‘I’ is not your real self. ‘I’ is imposed on reality. When you call somebody ‘you’, you are not addressing the real self of the other. Again you have imposed a label on it. When all the labels are taken away, the real self remains — and the real self is as much yours as it is others. The real self is one.

That’s why we go on saying that we participate in each other’s beings, we are members of each other. Our real reality is God. We may be like icebergs floating in the ocean — they appear to be separate — but once we melt, nothing will be left. Definition will disappear, limitation will disappear, and the iceberg will not be there. It will become part of the ocean. The ego is an iceberg. Melt it. Melt it in deep love, so it disappears and you become part of the ocean.

I have heard…. The Judge looked very severe. “Mulla,” he said, “your wife says you hit her over the head with a baseball bat and threw her down a flight of stairs. What have you got to say for yourself?”

Mulla Nasrudin rubbed the side of his nose with his hand, and meditated. Finally he said, “Your Honor, I guess there are three sides to this case: my wife’s story, my story, and the truth.”

Yes, he is perfectly right.

“You have heard about two sides of a truth,” he said, “but there are three sides” — and he is exactly right. There is your story, my story, and the truth; I and you and the truth.

The truth is neither I nor you. I and you is an imposition on the vastness of the truth. ‘I’ is false, ‘you’ is false; utilitarian, useful in the world. It will be difficult to manage the world without ‘I’ and ‘you’. Good — use them, but they are just devices of the world. In reality, there is neither ‘you’ nor ‘I’. Something, someone, some energy exists with no limitations, with no boundaries. Out of it we come, and into it we disappear again.

Source – Osho Book “The Beloved, Vol 1″

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Osho Teachings (Osho answers questions of his disciples)

"Acceptance Self Love" - Osho on Perfectionism – Perfectionism is a neurosis

Question – I am so confused. I want to perfect myself, but have lost all idea what effort to make in what way. Your presence makes me want to let go, but much else urges me toward a desperate program of self-renewal. what can i do?

Osho – Perfectionism is a neurosis. It is an illness. And the more you try to become perfect, the more frustrated you will become. The goal of perfection has led the whole of humanity towards madness; the earth has almost become a madhouse. I don’t teach perfection. What do I teach? I teach wholeness, not perfection. Be whole; be total; but don’t think about perfection.

Be whole. Whatsoever you do, do it totally. What is the difference? When you do it totally you are not worried about the result. You did it totally. You are finished. More you could not do. You are not holding anything; you have put all your energy in it, you were whole in it. Now if you fail, you fail. If you succeed, you succeed. But whether you fail or you succeed, you are fulfilled all the same. A deep contentment arises because you have done whatsoever you could do.

You can never be perfect. How can the part be perfect? You can never be perfect. Whatsoever you do, you can always imagine that it could have been better — whatsoever you do, you can imagine that better could have been done.

I have heard about a great painter. He was seventy years old, and one day he finished his painting and started crying and weeping. His disciples surrounded the master and said, “Master, why are you crying? What has happened?”

The master said, “I cannot see any imperfection in this painting. It seems I am dead, finished. It seems I have lost my imagination; that’s why I’m crying. This is the first time I cannot see any defect in my painting. I must have lost my imagination.”

Whatsoever you do, you can always imagine better. So a perfectionist is always in misery. He can never be satisfied, never; that is not for him. I want you to be whole. Whatsoever you do, you do totally and you are not concerned with the result. You are only concerned that you are not withholding anything. You love; you love totally. You meditate; you meditate totally. You dance; you dance totally. You just become the dance and forget the dancer completely. Whether the dance was perfect or not is not the question at all. And who is to decide? Only one thing you have to decide — whether you were totally in it or not. If you were totally in it, I say it is perfect — if you were not totally in it, I say it is imperfect. That is my meaning of perfection.

It is not comparative. If you dance, you may not dance like Udaya Shanker. Comparatively your dance may be poorer than Udaya Shanker’s. But there is a possibility you may be more total in it than Udaya Shanker himself in his dance. Then I say you are more perfect: because it is not a question of form; it is a question of your inner involvement. If the ego drops, then it is whole, then it is total.

I have heard that there was a man in Socrates’ time — his name was Alcibiades. He was a perfectionist and of course, he was the most miserable man. Always worried, because everything is going wrong. He was very rich, he could purchase anything. But he wasn’t happy because there was always something else to be purchased, something else to be brought to his treasury. He travelled all over the world, but whenever he would come back to Athens he was more miserable than before.

He came to see Socrates and he asked Socrates, “Why am I so miserable? — and I have travelled all over the world. I am the most travelled man in Athens, and one would think that travelling gives experience and maturity. But nothing like that has happened to me. I have become more and more miserable. And I go to the far-off countries and then come back, from India, from China, but I’m not gaining any experience. I am becoming more and more imperfect day by day, rather than becoming perfect. What is the trouble with me?”

Socrates said, “Because you take yourself always with yourself. Wherever you go you take yourself with yourself; that is the trouble. This time you go alone. Leave yourself in Athens. Then there is a possibility of maturity.”

If you drop the ego, there is a possibility you may become whole. The moment you become whole, you become holy. Then you are healed; then all wounds disappear. Then you are perfect in your total aloneness. It is not comparative — that you are more perfect than others. No. You are simply perfect; you are a unique piece; there is nobody else like you; you are only like yourself. In your wholeness you are perfect, and a deep contentment comes. It becomes a climate around you.

Source – Osho Book “Come Follow To You, Vol 3″

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"Acceptance Self Love" - Osho - Whatsoever you say about others, says more about you

Question – Osho, here with you is the deepest, most growing place for me to be and i dislike much of what i see here — dead rajneeshianity rising like an ikon, licentiousness not freedom emerging, arrogance and aggressiveness the rule, humility and caring the exception. Opening to the awareness that these are my qualities, projected, returns me to a deep appreciation in being here. thank you.

Osho – This is from Amitabh. I can only say, “Thank you, Amitabh.” If you can understand that it is your own mind projecting things, nothing need be said. You have understood the right thing.

Always remember, the whole world acts like a screen, and you go on projecting yourself. Whatsoever you say about others, says more about you. It does not say anything about others; because how can you know others? — you don’t even know yourself.

If this awareness has come to you, that this is your own projection — beautiful. Keep it; hold it fast so it does not slip away. And not only about this ashram: about the whole world. Always remember, that you go on seeing your own face. The world acts like a mirror.

And that should never be your worry — how the world is — because nothing can be done about that. All that can be done has to be done by you, with you, upon yourself. Once you change, your projections will disappear. Once YOU change, the world will remain the same, but it will not be the same at all.

Because you are your world. It comes out of you, and spreads outwards. Always remember, whenever you see something in somebody, first look within: the other may have functioned as a mirror. And try to change your inner being. It has always happened that when you become silent the whole world becomes silent; when you become loving the whole world becomes loving. It reflects you, it echoes you; it is you, magnified a million-fold. But it is you: you are your world; there is no other world. This is the meaning of the Hindu concept, MAYA — illusion.

The whole world is illusory because it is just your projection. once your projections disappear, then suddenly you become aware that world has disappeared, and another world has arisen, the real. When you don’t have anything to project then the real arises, that which is. Call it God, call it truth, or whatsoever you like; but the only way to know that truth, is to become aware of your projections. And in awareness they start dropping by and by.

The day is not far off when projections will disappear, if you can remain aware. Awareness is a tremendous fire: it burns all, root and all. It burns the very seeds. And only then, the truth is realized.

Source – Osho Book “Come Follow To You, Vol 3″

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"Acceptance Self Love" Osho – How can one be oneself if one is not oneself?

Question – Your teaching seems to be: to be absolutely oneself. This is beyond me. How can one be oneself if one is not oneself?

Osho – Let me ask you another question: how can you not be yourself? You can believe it, but you cannot be anything other than yourself. You can think that you are somebody else, you can imagine that you are somebody else, but all the time you are just yourself, nothing else.

So whether you believe you are yourself or not is irrelevant. You remain, all the time, yourself. You can go on running and chasing shadows, but one day or the other you will have to realize that you have just been doing an absurd thing. How can you be other than yourself7 How? You ask me how one can be oneself. I ask you how one can be other than oneself — and in my questioning is the answer. Nobody has even been other than himself; nobody can ever be other than himself. To be oneself is the only way to be, nothing can be done about it.

You can believe…. It is just like you sleep at night in Poona and you dream that you are in Philadelphia. That doesn’t make any change in reality. You remain in Poona — here, somewhere in Mobo’s. You remain in Poona; Philadelphia remains just a dream. In the morning you will not wake up in Philadelphia, remember. You will wake up in Mobo’s, in Poona. Howsoever miserable, but it is the case! Nothing can be done about it; at the most you can again dream of Philadelphia.

You are gods. That is your reality. You can believe… you have believed in many things. Sometimes you believed you were a tree — many trees are still believing that. Sometimes you believed you were an animal: a tiger, a lion. There are a few people who belong to Lion Clubs — Lion Bhabhutmal Sanghvi. They are not satisfied in being men — lions! Sometimes you believed that you were a lion, and then you WERE a lion: a dream. Sometimes you believed that you were a rock and you WERE a rock: a dream. You have been changing your dreams.

Now the time has arrived. Wake up! I’m not giving you another dream, remember. You hanker for it, you would like me to give you another dream, but I am not going to give you another dream. That’s why to be with me is difficult and arduous — because I am insisting that you wake up. Enough is enough. You have dreamed a lot; since eternity you have been dreaming. You have just been changing dreams. When you get fed up with one dream, you start changing it; you dream another dream. My whole effort is to shake you, to shock you — to wake you.

It is not a question of achieving any new thing. It is already your being. Just opening the eyes, just dropping the dreams, just dropping the clouds and the vision. It is a question of clarity and understanding, that’s all. Between you and Jesus, between you and me, between you and Buddha, there is no difference of being — nothing. You are exactly the same. The difference, at the most, is that you are asleep and Jesus is not asleep, that’s all.

So don’t ask me how to be oneself; you cannot be otherwise. Just ask me how to be awake. You are yourself ALL THE TIME! Just become a little more alert, just bring a new quality of waking consciousness — just watch. Don’t try to be anything because that will again be a dream. Just watch: whosoever you are, wheresoever you are, just watch and be… and allow it. Then the happening, the sudden happening, can come any moment. The heavens can open and the spirit of God, like a dove, can enter in you.

In fact, this is just a way of saying something that cannot be said. It can be said in just the opposite terms also. Let me say it: that when John the Baptist initiated, baptized, Jesus — Jesus opened and the spirit of God, like a dove, was released from him and flew into the infinite sky. That is also exactly the same truth. It is just a way of saying it from two polarities.

You are gods and you have never been anything else. That’s why I am not worried if you want to sleep a little longer. Nothing is wrong; the choice is up to you. You can have a little more sleep — turn over and have a little more sleep; snore a little longer — nothing is wrong. But don’t try to improve, don’t try to achieve anything. Don’t try to become anything because you are already that which you can become! The being is your only becoming, you carry your destiny within yourself. Relax… and be.

Source – Osho Book “Come Follow To You, Vol 1″

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